Top 5 Misconceptions About Communication

Last week we said that communication makes or breaks relationships.

Communication is the glue between people and the better we get at it, the more happy and successful we become.

Another aspect that is easily overlooked is the way we think about it.

As a psychologist working with people all around the world, I have come across 5 misconceptions that undermine people's performance as a leader, a team member, an influencer, or a business person.

Misconceptions stand in the way of positive outcomes.

Misconceptions sabotage people's future.

Misconceptions take away from happiness and create more disconnect, misunderstandings, disagreements and fallouts.

In some extreme cases, I have seen how misconceptions and poor communication led to severe physical illness because the person wasn't enjoying wellness in their relationships.

Let's summarize the top 5 misconceptions:

1. "Treat people they way you want to be treated." It means that you think there is a "one size fits all" approach. The truth is different. We have found that there are four distinct communication styles. If you relate to people in their respective style, you become highly influential and effective. In contrast, not modifying your approach is the #1 reason why you don't get along with other people (and miss opportunities).
2. "It's a numbers game." We often say this in marketing, recruitment and business development. You have to generate X leads to convert Y sales. You need to recruit X people to keep Y good ones. You got to make X calls to book Y meetings etc. This reasoning is so simplistic that it risks missing out of the WAY we go about it. It's not necessarily about working harder, making more efforts or putting more people through. We have seen countless times how we can achieve more with less by focusing on the quality of the communication. Making sure it sticks and has the effect we want.
3. "Certain people are gifted." We assume that they were born with a  special gene; they are "naturals" in your eyes. This type of reasoning gives you an excuse to fail in advance. We see it in gyms when people are trying to loose weight... We see it in terms of public speaking... We see it in business development... Having said that, no single Olympic athlete ever won gold merely on "being gifted". Which leads us to the next point.
4. "I'm not good at____" (e.g. communicating with others; influencing others). It's easy to put ourselves down and find fault with ourselves. We can be our own worst enemy. And yet, it doesn't have to be that way. Simply put: the more you practice something, the better you get at it. The same applies to communication. 
5. "People are being difficult; they resist what I am trying to achieve". I've heard this from so many leaders over the years. But it doesn't stop there. People experience this with colleagues at work or receive "pushback" from dear friends and family members. People experience "resistance" from potential clients... All show thinking rooted in conflict. Once again, it doesn't have to be that way. We've helped thousands of people change their approach and create buy-in. This is about communicating in proven ways that helps people feel comfortable and provides them with the logical justification they need. Very different. 

If you like this topic and would like to learn more, join me in my web class "3 Secrets To Wake The Communicator Genius Inside You" this week.

If you had enough of spinning your wheels, having disagreements with others, or simply not getting the outcomes you want in dealing with people, this is for you!

One word of caution: it is a strictly LIVE event. No replays. For 49 people only.

So get in quick before we sell out.

See you then,

Bram Lagrou